Background Blog
Ok let’s get the formalities out of the way:
(1) Went to a belly-dancing class last Thursday that was awesome. This very basic/beginner class had me so sore, I couldn’t believe it. It’s amazing how hard you have to work initially when you are first starting to learn how to isolate the correct muscles to make your hips and shoulders move independently from other body parts. I never believed the hype around how great a workout it was because the professionals made it look so easy. Well, let me tell ‘ya, BELIEVE THE HYPE! This is a great low-impact workout that will have your body screaming for more.
(2) Met w/ Trent my trainer at MidCity last Friday and he murdered me! We are doing total-body training so everything, and I do mean everything, is getting worked out in each session. I love/hate the workouts so much that I am going to sign up sessions 2x/wk instead of just once.
Now on to the meat of this blog….
As I was looking over my old blogs, I realized that I never gave any background information about myself so that everyone could get an idea of exactly what issues I am dealing with. Writing about this part of my life will not only be cathartic for me but hopefully well help my readers identify with me, so here it is….
My weight has fluctuated since I started gaining weight at the ripe old age of 8 (or at least that’s the age that my selective memory associates with my weight gain). My mother had me on diet programs since around that time until I took over to torch and began to torture myself with agonizing schemes to lose weight. From acupuncture to Jenny Craig to phentermine, I’ve tried them all. I would lose weight initially just to gain some (and at times all) of the weight back.
The lowest weight I can remember weighing was 190lbs and that was in the 6th grade! I managed to get down to 193lbs a few years ago but I didn’t do it the healthy way. I was on phentermine, smoking cigarettes, going out almost every night drinking but not eating, dancing 6 days/week, 1-1/2hrs/day (I was on a dance scholarship at Joel Hall Dance Center in Chicago) and taking laxatives. The dancing was the only positive part of my life at that time. I looked GREAT on the outside but felt HORRIBLE on the inside.
Not long after that, I fell into depression and proceeded to gain 50lbs in approximately three years. Right before I hit rock bottom, I decided to go to counseling. Keep in mind that all of this was happening while I was enrolled in Graduate School. In fact, graduate school was the only thing that kept me sane as I dealt with a lot of demons.
Interesting side note: When I was at my lowest point in this process, I managed to go to a casting at a friend’s urging, and book an Ebony Magazine beauty editorial that featured Jennifer Hudson (after her stint on American Idol) and myself that highlighted “plus” fashion (July 2004). Although I was not pleased with how I looked at the time and had, in fact, put my aspiring modeling career on hold, I still fit the bill. A classic case of beauty in the eye of the beholder.
Anyway, back to my odyssey. At the end of June 2004 I left Chicago (and me fiancé) and moved to New York to intern in the music industry. I actually started losing weight before I left for New York by changing my diet and juicing fresh fruits and vegetables. I also did a lot of research in nutrition and changed my habits as I learned about the different healing properties in whole foods.
My time alone in New York proved helpful in getting my act together. I managed to come down to 211lbs by August of 2005. That’s when my fiancé moved to New York to be with me and I got comfortable in our relationship gain. My fiancé is a big teddy bear and we both like to eat so it was business as usual. I proceeded to yo-yo my way to a net 30lb gain from around October 2005 thru April 2007.
I turned 30 at the end of April and reached my turning point. I realized that I am always going to be a bigger person but that doesn’t mean I can’t be FLY!! Thankfully, my dear friend Madeline Jones approached me with the Shape-Up program and I immediately agreed to it. A few weeks later, I was off and running.
From early June to the present, you’ve witnessed me struggle thru the Shape-Up plan but even still, I’ve managed to lose about 10 lbs. I will keep going. I will be healthy. I may never reach my ideal weight but I will reach my perfect weight.
Thru all of this, I have grown to appreciate both my inner and outer beauty. I get frustrated at times, but I am finally at the point were I realize that regardless of what’s going on with my outer shell, the inner one is just wonderful.
As I was looking over my old blogs, I realized that I never gave any background information about myself so that everyone could get an idea of exactly what issues I am dealing with. Writing about this part of my life will not only be cathartic for me but hopefully well help my readers identify with me, so here it is….
My weight has fluctuated since I started gaining weight at the ripe old age of 8 (or at least that’s the age that my selective memory associates with my weight gain). My mother had me on diet programs since around that time until I took over to torch and began to torture myself with agonizing schemes to lose weight. From acupuncture to Jenny Craig to phentermine, I’ve tried them all. I would lose weight initially just to gain some (and at times all) of the weight back.
The lowest weight I can remember weighing was 190lbs and that was in the 6th grade! I managed to get down to 193lbs a few years ago but I didn’t do it the healthy way. I was on phentermine, smoking cigarettes, going out almost every night drinking but not eating, dancing 6 days/week, 1-1/2hrs/day (I was on a dance scholarship at Joel Hall Dance Center in Chicago) and taking laxatives. The dancing was the only positive part of my life at that time. I looked GREAT on the outside but felt HORRIBLE on the inside.
Not long after that, I fell into depression and proceeded to gain 50lbs in approximately three years. Right before I hit rock bottom, I decided to go to counseling. Keep in mind that all of this was happening while I was enrolled in Graduate School. In fact, graduate school was the only thing that kept me sane as I dealt with a lot of demons.
Interesting side note: When I was at my lowest point in this process, I managed to go to a casting at a friend’s urging, and book an Ebony Magazine beauty editorial that featured Jennifer Hudson (after her stint on American Idol) and myself that highlighted “plus” fashion (July 2004). Although I was not pleased with how I looked at the time and had, in fact, put my aspiring modeling career on hold, I still fit the bill. A classic case of beauty in the eye of the beholder.
Anyway, back to my odyssey. At the end of June 2004 I left Chicago (and me fiancé) and moved to New York to intern in the music industry. I actually started losing weight before I left for New York by changing my diet and juicing fresh fruits and vegetables. I also did a lot of research in nutrition and changed my habits as I learned about the different healing properties in whole foods.
My time alone in New York proved helpful in getting my act together. I managed to come down to 211lbs by August of 2005. That’s when my fiancé moved to New York to be with me and I got comfortable in our relationship gain. My fiancé is a big teddy bear and we both like to eat so it was business as usual. I proceeded to yo-yo my way to a net 30lb gain from around October 2005 thru April 2007.
I turned 30 at the end of April and reached my turning point. I realized that I am always going to be a bigger person but that doesn’t mean I can’t be FLY!! Thankfully, my dear friend Madeline Jones approached me with the Shape-Up program and I immediately agreed to it. A few weeks later, I was off and running.
From early June to the present, you’ve witnessed me struggle thru the Shape-Up plan but even still, I’ve managed to lose about 10 lbs. I will keep going. I will be healthy. I may never reach my ideal weight but I will reach my perfect weight.
Thru all of this, I have grown to appreciate both my inner and outer beauty. I get frustrated at times, but I am finally at the point were I realize that regardless of what’s going on with my outer shell, the inner one is just wonderful.
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